Advent – Daily Compass

I have celebrated Advent before but I no longer await the birth of a child whose parentage I can no longer believe in, let alone love. My view of the Christian God is one of a violent, angry and jealous God; if we are indeed made in HIS image, I do NOT want to be like that. And the whole masculine identity is insufficient to me to describe an all-powerful, all-knowing, but most importantly, ALL-LOVING deity.
So sadly, today’s Daily Compass has no particular resonance nor even any particular sacredness, except where my fellow beings ascribe that sacred. I might have gone at this a slightly different way, for example:
“The Christian season of Advent begins today, where many people around the world are eagerly marking the time until the birth of Jesus. But for those who are not Christians, is there no advent, no time of waiting for a Sacred Arrival? Even at Christmastime, those who are not Christian are still looking forward to a holiday season of seeing family and friends. But there are many other kinds of Advent seasons. Just ask any pregnant woman who is awaiting the birth of her own Sacred Child.

What are you looking forward to with sacred anticipation?”

Just my small offering, for those of us who do not await the White Christ, or perhaps do not walk a spiritual path that has any particular form of a Sacred Being, or a path without any other Sacred Being but our own.

And for those with the automatic response that Christmas is a Christian holiday…not any more. It is a part of our national image, it is a massive commercial event and sadly, the holiness of the season has pretty much gone the way of the dodo. Even those who will tell you that they are devout to the season, attend Midnight Mass on Christmas Eve…still have lavish decorations and way too many presents for human beings under their trees.

Do you want truly celebrate the Sacred Birth? Then give up your presents and decorations and take that money to a food pantry, a women’s shelter (which is where many a child is also housed); buy trial sizes of shampoo, mouthwash, a toothbrush, a washcloth, a small comb and put them into holiday bags to hand out where the homeless congregate –or horrors! actually go into the streets and give them out to anyone who is obviously in need. And if you are financially able, hide a $5, $10 or even a $20 bill in there–and never, ever consider what they will “probably spend it on”. That’s none of your business. Once a gift leaves your hands, it no longer belongs to you and you have no say in what happens to it. (That include ALL gift giving, I’m afraid.)
Do NOT just hand a sum of money to your local charity and feel assured that those who really need it will get it. The only way to know that for sure: hand it to the ones who need it directly. And you don’t even really have to say much beyond, “This is for you, happy holidays.”
Ask your minister (or social justice committee) who within your own congregation needs help. (Trust me, they exist!) And then make a shopping trip for all of the holiday food, the same as you would buy for yourself, get some small presents of things that serve no purpose other than fun: deck of cards, “Uno”, stuffed animals for the children–for all that’s holy, NOT something useful like toothbrushes or soap. This is a holiday gift, not a hand out. (What you give to the poor is both because they do not have the resources to be able to choose gifts and they desperately NEED what we consider “normal purchases”.) Wrap it all up in holiday bags (even the groceries) and have someone else, preferably the minister or a representative from the social justice committee to deliver it without any mention of who paid for it. And if they assume it’s the entire congregation and give public thanks, that will be more than you should be looking for. This is NOT about recognition for you. And if your entire congregation does this for several families, then you join in with all that you can share, even if it means that your home has a little less. A little less is way better than none at all, which is how you can explain it to the greedy little beggars that live with you. I mean, your children. And don’t worry, mine were greedy little beggars too. Frankly, they can be your best source for picking out little presents that a child their age would like. You just make it very clear, as you are paying for them, that this is their (and the family’s) gift to other children whose parents cannot afford to buy them toys like you do–but reassure them that Santa will still visit–both houses! (And if you can find the time away from your kids, and have the money, buy a slightly larger present for kid(s) in the “other” family, wrapped specifically in Santa paper and put a note on it that indicates The Fat Guy is making sure that (each) Junior gets a toy from him! You get the idea.

What if you’re a single-type person? If your abode will hold several, invite other singles who have no family to go to (or can’t afford the costs of travel at this most costly time of year), to come to your house. Offer to buy the meat (if you can) and ask that each person make a dish to share. If your house doesn’t have the room, ask to use the fellowship hall at the building you worship in. Make it a congregation-wide invite potluck. Do a small present exchange, setting the prices at absolutely NO MORE than $5–in cost. If someone wants to buy $5 worth of yarn and crochet a hat, that’s awesome. Make it sign-up, with everyone either picking a dish out of the general holiday menu, or indicating what they will bring so that you don’t end up with a “Green Bean Casserole” dinner. (It is not out of the realm of possibility that there is some money within the minister’s discretionary account or the social justice’s budget to actually buy a turkey or two, depending on the sign up. Which solves the meat problem.) And make the vegetarians responsible for making dishes with no meat/dairy and et cetera. Ask for index cards to be placed with each dish, listing the name and ingredients therein so that folks with dietary (or personal) limitations do not eat something that they would not choose or might make them have allergic reactions!

Instead of throwing your change into the Salvation Army’s pot, take that money and yourself down to their soup kitchen and serve Christmas dinner to those who come to be fed on this Holy Day. (Every day is holy to someone, maybe even you!) And in this case, take a big bag of sweets, or some baked goodies (lots, you can ask the kitchen how many they expect to feed and if you’re up to it, make cookies for them!)…but I’d suggest that like buying Halloween candy–if you wouldn’t eat it, don’t think it’s okay to offer to other people. (Excluding health reasons, of course)

Another possibility, and one I have used in my own gift-giving. Once upon a time, I spent a Christmas with 10 other people and none of us had much money. So…every person (including the little ones) were given $10 dollars and turned loose in the dollar store, to buy one thing for each of the other people. Total cost of presents: $100. Plus tax, $7. Plus $11 dollars for large gift bags to hold each person’s gifts–and we got to pick our own! Plus $2-3 for 2-3 tissue paper bundles and $2 for tape. Total cost: $132. Gifts for 11 people: priceless!
So if your wallet allows, go to the dollar store(s) and buy $200, $300, or maybe you can even afford $500 in items to hand out at the soup kitchen and or women’s shelter / men’s shelter. Suggested items: combs, hair barrettes and pony tail holders, handkerchiefs (bandannas), socks, hand warmers, flashlights, scarves, mittens, hats, nail clippers, lighters, unbreakable mugs or glasses, unbreakable storage containers, deck of cards, batteries, reflective tape, work gloves, penknives, boxes of candy, food items (that do not require cooking or preparation, so tinned meats (tuna and sardines) but not tomato sauce and a package of pasta…you get the idea); camping supplies such as thermal (mylar) blankets, a small pan, etc, depending on the inventory of the dollar store; stuffed animals (yes, they like them too!); puzzle books; bungee cords or tie downs; pens; writing tablets; the hallmark of whatever you buy is that it addresses the reality of being homeless: everything you own has to be carried; you are your own home, so you must have appropriate clothing to handle the local climate and everything you own stands a very good chance of being stolen, so it must not be completely irreplaceable. And while the homeless may be “house challenged”, they are still human beings, sacred and worthy of our respect, to be treated as fellow travelers on this little blue dot.

Given the quantities you’re looking for, you might actually try spreading this purchasing over the whole year, so that by December, it’s all bought. Buying it in smaller amounts means that you can also wrap it, bit by bit (just in tissue paper). If you do get the whole shebang at once, make it a congregational activity–everyone else brings a couple dozen cookies, you put on the pots for tea and coffee, then everyone else helps you wrap these all up. Don’t worry about separating them into “men’s” or “women’s” colored wrapping. Hand them all out and let the recipients trade with each other for the item they particularly want. (This is a part of the homeless life and seems to work very well.)

If you mention this Dollar Store extravaganza to your social justice committee (or whatever you call your outreach group), they may add some money in, or perhaps do a “gently used” coat drive from the other members which can be given at the same time as the little presents. BTW, coats are great–but you could also ask for “gently used” blankets–lap blankets, afghans, old bed blankets, and so on. The homeless have to be warm with what they can carry or wear… Just another idea for helping and really keeping in line with the specifics Jesus gave his followers: Feed the hungry, clothe the naked, heal the sick, visit those who are in prison. Stuff that can (and should be done) year round…but at the holiday times, is even more necessary.

And don’t forget: there are children among the homeless population. So children’s coats, mittens, scarves and so on are always welcome. Some small toys, little dolls, or cars or whatever is a good idea–even the adults can like them! It’s a frivolous item in a life that has very little frivolity. And while helping meet the actual physical needs is very important, something to meet the need for play and spontaneous joy is just as important.

This is a time for families. We are all a part of the human family. If you do not know how to reach out to those of our family in need at any other time of the year, please, please do so at this time. Peace and blessings to you all, Namaste!

3 thoughts on “Advent”

KittyG says:

November 30, 2014 at 1:31 pm

I have celebrated Advent before but I no longer await the birth of a child whose parentage I can no longer believe in, let alone love. My view of the Christian God is one of a violent, angry and jealous God; if we are indeed made in HIS image, I do NOT want to be like that. And the whole masculine identity is insufficient to me to describe an all-powerful, all-knowing, but most importantly, ALL-LOVING deity.
So sadly, today’s Daily Compass has no particular resonance nor even any particular sacredness, except where my fellow beings ascribe that sacred. I might have gone at this a slightly different way, for example:
“The Christian season of Advent begins today, where many people around the world are eagerly marking the time until the birth of Jesus. But for those who are not Christians, is there no advent, no time of waiting for a Sacred Arrival? Even at Christmastime, those who are not Christian are still looking forward to a holiday season of seeing family and friends. But there are many other kinds of Advent seasons. Just ask any pregnant woman who is awaiting the birth of her own Sacred Child.

What are you looking forward to with sacred anticipation?”

Just my small offering, for those of us who do not await the White Christ, or perhaps do not walk a spiritual path that has any particular form of a Sacred Being, or a path without any other Sacred Being but our own.

And for those with the automatic response that Christmas is a Christian holiday…not any more. It is a part of our national image, it is a massive commercial event and sadly, the holiness of the season has pretty much gone the way of the dodo. Even those who will tell you that they are devout to the season, attend Midnight Mass on Christmas Eve…still have lavish decorations and way too many presents for human beings under their trees.

Do you want truly celebrate the Sacred Birth? Then give up your presents and decorations and take that money to a food pantry, a women’s shelter (which is where many a child is also housed); buy trial sizes of shampoo, mouthwash, a toothbrush, a washcloth, a small comb and put them into holiday bags to hand out where the homeless congregate –or horrors! actually go into the streets and give them out to anyone who is obviously in need. And if you are financially able, hide a $5, $10 or even a $20 bill in there–and never, ever consider what they will “probably spend it on”. That’s none of your business. Once a gift leaves your hands, it no longer belongs to you and you have no say in what happens to it. (That include ALL gift giving, I’m afraid.)
Do NOT just hand a sum of money to your local charity and feel assured that those who really need it will get it. The only way to know that for sure: hand it to the ones who need it directly. And you don’t even really have to say much beyond, “This is for you, happy holidays.”
Ask your minister (or social justice committee) who within your own congregation needs help. (Trust me, they exist!) And then make a shopping trip for all of the holiday food, the same as you would buy for yourself, get some small presents of things that serve no purpose other than fun: deck of cards, “Uno”, stuffed animals for the children–for all that’s holy, NOT something useful like toothbrushes or soap. This is a holiday gift, not a hand out. (What you give to the poor is both because they do not have the resources to be able to choose gifts and they desperately NEED what we consider “normal purchases”.) Wrap it all up in holiday bags (even the groceries) and have someone else, preferably the minister or a representative from the social justice committee to deliver it without any mention of who paid for it. And if they assume it’s the entire congregation and give public thanks, that will be more than you should be looking for. This is NOT about recognition for you. And if your entire congregation does this for several families, then you join in with all that you can share, even if it means that your home has a little less. A little less is way better than none at all, which is how you can explain it to the greedy little beggars that live with you. I mean, your children. And don’t worry, mine were greedy little beggars too. Frankly, they can be your best source for picking out little presents that a child their age would like. You just make it very clear, as you are paying for them, that this is their (and the family’s) gift to other children whose parents cannot afford to buy them toys like you do–but reassure them that Santa will still visit–both houses! (And if you can find the time away from your kids, and have the money, buy a slightly larger present for kid(s) in the “other” family, wrapped specifically in Santa paper and put a note on it that indicates The Fat Guy is making sure that (each) Junior gets a toy from him! You get the idea.

What if you’re a single-type person? If your abode will hold several, invite other singles who have no family to go to (or can’t afford the costs of travel at this most costly time of year), to come to your house. Offer to buy the meat (if you can) and ask that each person make a dish to share. If your house doesn’t have the room, ask to use the fellowship hall at the building you worship in. Make it a congregation-wide invite potluck. Do a small present exchange, setting the prices at absolutely NO MORE than $5–in cost. If someone wants to buy $5 worth of yarn and crochet a hat, that’s awesome. Make it sign-up, with everyone either picking a dish out of the general holiday menu, or indicating what they will bring so that you don’t end up with a “Green Bean Casserole” dinner. (It is not out of the realm of possibility that there is some money within the minister’s discretionary account or the social justice’s budget to actually buy a turkey or two, depending on the sign up. Which solves the meat problem.) And make the vegetarians responsible for making dishes with no meat/dairy and et cetera. Ask for index cards to be placed with each dish, listing the name and ingredients therein so that folks with dietary (or personal) limitations do not eat something that they would not choose or might make them have allergic reactions!

Instead of throwing your change into the Salvation Army’s pot, take that money and yourself down to their soup kitchen and serve Christmas dinner to those who come to be fed on this Holy Day. (Every day is holy to someone, maybe even you!) And in this case, take a big bag of sweets, or some baked goodies (lots, you can ask the kitchen how many they expect to feed and if you’re up to it, make cookies for them!)…but I’d suggest that like buying Halloween candy–if you wouldn’t eat it, don’t think it’s okay to offer to other people. (Excluding health reasons, of course)

Another possibility, and one I have used in my own gift-giving. Once upon a time, I spent a Christmas with 10 other people and none of us had much money. So…every person (including the little ones) were given $10 dollars and turned loose in the dollar store, to buy one thing for each of the other people. Total cost of presents: $100. Plus tax, $7. Plus $11 dollars for large gift bags to hold each person’s gifts–and we got to pick our own! Plus $2-3 for 2-3 tissue paper bundles and $2 for tape. Total cost: $132. Gifts for 11 people: priceless!
So if your wallet allows, go to the dollar store(s) and buy $200, $300, or maybe you can even afford $500 in items to hand out at the soup kitchen and or women’s shelter / men’s shelter. Suggested items: combs, hair barrettes and pony tail holders, handkerchiefs (bandannas), socks, hand warmers, flashlights, scarves, mittens, hats, nail clippers, lighters, unbreakable mugs or glasses, unbreakable storage containers, deck of cards, batteries, reflective tape, work gloves, penknives, boxes of candy, food items (that do not require cooking or preparation, so tinned meats (tuna and sardines) but not tomato sauce and a package of pasta…you get the idea); camping supplies such as thermal (mylar) blankets, a small pan, etc, depending on the inventory of the dollar store; stuffed animals (yes, they like them too!); puzzle books; bungee cords or tie downs; pens; writing tablets; the hallmark of whatever you buy is that it addresses the reality of being homeless: everything you own has to be carried; you are your own home, so you must have appropriate clothing to handle the local climate and everything you own stands a very good chance of being stolen, so it must not be completely irreplaceable. And while the homeless may be “house challenged”, they are still human beings, sacred and worthy of our respect, to be treated as fellow travelers on this little blue dot.

Given the quantities you’re looking for, you might actually try spreading this purchasing over the whole year, so that by December, it’s all bought. Buying it in smaller amounts means that you can also wrap it, bit by bit (just in tissue paper). If you do get the whole shebang at once, make it a congregational activity–everyone else brings a couple dozen cookies, you put on the pots for tea and coffee, then everyone else helps you wrap these all up. Don’t worry about separating them into “men’s” or “women’s” colored wrapping. Hand them all out and let the recipients trade with each other for the item they particularly want. (This is a part of the homeless life and seems to work very well.)

If you mention this Dollar Store extravaganza to your social justice committee (or whatever you call your outreach group), they may add some money in, or perhaps do a “gently used” coat drive from the other members which can be given at the same time as the little presents. BTW, coats are great–but you could also ask for “gently used” blankets–lap blankets, afghans, old bed blankets, and so on. The homeless have to be warm with what they can carry or wear… Just another idea for helping and really keeping in line with the specifics Jesus gave his followers: Feed the hungry, clothe the naked, heal the sick, visit those who are in prison. Stuff that can (and should be done) year round…but at the holiday times, is even more necessary.

And don’t forget: there are children among the homeless population. So children’s coats, mittens, scarves and so on are always welcome. Some small toys, little dolls, or cars or whatever is a good idea–even the adults can like them! It’s a frivolous item in a life that has very little frivolity. And while helping meet the actual physical needs is very important, something to meet the need for play and spontaneous joy is just as important.

This is a time for families. We are all a part of the human family. If you do not know how to reach out to those of our family in need at any other time of the year, please, please do so at this time. Peace and blessings to you all, Namaste!
patt behler says:

November 30, 2014 at 11:31 pm

Advent is a seasonal event with which I was never familiar nor have I ever participated. I prefer to believe in more humanistic relationships during the coming season and find that the celebrating that I do is based on friendships renewed or remembered. Also with a strong desire to learn anew how to search and find ways to encourage peace and reconciliation among nations is my motivation for participation in seasonal activities at this time of year.
sherrie says:

December 1, 2014 at 12:27 am

I am celebrating advent for the 1st time in over 15 years and am enjoying reconnecting with my Mystic Christianity. I am looking forward to my continued studies of “A course in miracles” and perhaps starting a Mary Magdalene circle. musical growth as well ie sharing my musical abilities with others.

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