Friday, March 30: “Missing God”

Inspiration:

Today you will lose something, but also gain something. This will happen tomorrow as well. 

Missing God

“I can’t believe what I was taught to believe,” said the woman facing me. “I’ve just read too much. I know that stories in the Bible were drawn from other cultures and myths, and reason and my experience have taught me different things. So I can’t believe what I used to believe.” She paused, and looked at me sadly. “It’s just … there’s something in me … I …” She looked at me, a bit sheepish, a bit sad.

“You miss God?” I asked. She nodded.

I understood.

I’d gone through my own stripping-away, discarding things that no longer made sense, setting aside immature, not well-examined beliefs. But out in nature, or at the end of the day, when I used to “talk to God,” I missed what I used to have. A connection, or a conversation, with … what?

A wise friend, sensing where I was, sent me a quote by John Shelby Spong:

I do not experience God as a supernatural power, external to life invading my world in supernatural power. I see no evidence to think this definition is real. The problem is that most people have so deeply identified this definition of God with God that when this definition dies the victim of expanded knowledge, we think that God has died.

So … even though my previous understanding of God no longer held value, might I find another understanding, with new value to me? I embarked on a journey, one which I am still on. I’ve explored panentheism, process theology, and world religions. Some things I keep, some I discard. All help me to expand my view of “God,” and connect with the transcending mystery.

For you, perhaps you’ll decide that “God,” as a word, holds no value for you. That’s fine. As many have pointed out, “God” is not God’s name.

But for those of us missing God, the journey to find a definition that fits our experience can take us to places of insight and reward; places where we feel we can embrace both reason and Spirit.