Foxes of story and legend have a reputation for being devious and clever, but this young one just looks curious, eager to know about the world around it. Of course, many people work hard at being clever and getting ahead of the next person, when they might be better served by a healthy dose of curiosity and the desire to understand rather than to win.
What have you learned to approach with curiosity?
Oh, this is a major topic for me. As some may know, I train, write and consult about consensus building, conflict resolution and related communication skills. One of the most useful of those skills is to develop a curious approach to anyone one you’re dealing with. If you are truly curious, you can more easily find out what interests or reasons underlie the other person’s positions. And you hear it with less stress on yourself because the intellectual activity of asking questions and thinking about the answers overrides more emotional responses.
And of course, knowing the other person’s underlying interests broadens the definition of what they really want. Then, it’s easier to find solutions that are acceptable to them as well as ourselves. In fact, we usually get more of what we really want than if we had haggled or compromised.
Margaret, so useful and right to the point. I am trying to put curiosity ahead of argument or immediate judgment. Thank you, I am slowly reading your book and hope to put it into more active use within our fellowship as well as in my own life. Thank you.
I find that being “curious” is given as a gift to me. In many ways, I search for it; finding out about the thoughts and ideas of another person widens the opportunities to know them. (I learned this “technique” in training when I belonged to a sorority during my days in a university; we were informed that during hour dances with visiting fraternity groups that we should ask questions of them while dancing or conversing with them. (What a surprise to realize that something that seemed silly at the time has served me to advantage in later life!) I find it exciting to find this quality in other people too.