Wedding Rings

RingsWedding photos are supposed to tell a story: one of a lifetime of wedded bliss, of a love great enough to meet all obstacles. Of course, the actual story of a marriage may turn out to be the story of a lifetime of loving devotion or a story of a few years of turmoil. Love stories pretty much always turn out to be more complicated than the pretty pictures.

What true story do you tell about love?

6 thoughts on “Wedding Rings”

  1. A true story about true love? That’s an idea. Of course, even true love doesn’t always run smoothly but that doesn’t change it from being true. As I’ve mentioned before, the various ways of showing love are the essence of love, I think. The word without action can be an empty act and a false indication. I do believe in great love between people, between people and animals and pets, and even a strong love of nature in all of its aspects. It touches the heart; it transforms both the lover and the object of true love into something very different from their earlier states of being.

  2. I did not see my maternal grandmother very often. My family moved out of the country when I was nearly three and stayed there until I was twenty-four. Every four years or so, we went back for a few weeks, but I didn’t come with every time once I was older. On most of those vacations, we only saw her for an afternoon, and she spent most of that time catching up with her daughter. We saw a bit more of each other when my family moved back, but as we were still a few hours away, we only saw each other every few months.

    We did write letters, however. Not consistently my whole life – except for the birthday cards/letters she always sent – but she did write to me regularly while I was trapped in a mental hospital for several months in my early teens. The last few years I wrote to her more often. It was hard to know what to say, and she couldn’t always respond due to her bad eyesight. We did it anyway.

    The language barrier wasn’t as severe by that point (I have immense problems with my native tongue). It used to get in the way a lot. My mom tells a story of how my grandmother and I had an animated conversation when I was little and how the two of us were talking about completely different things without realizing it. In my teens, she wrote in German and I wrote back in English, and there were a few things that got lost in translation. The letters in recent years seemed to work a bit better (from what I can tell; in the stories I just mentioned we didn’t realize something went wrong before my mom talked to both of us separately and connected the dots). We used the same language, and I had gotten better at it.

    I only wrote one letter to her in the last few months of her life. I had been meaning to write her, but I kept putting it off for reasons that now seem petty. Then she got really ill, and I was told she probably wouldn’t even understand a letter. Her health kept going up and down, so I didn’t know what state she was in. I wrote that one letter in hopes that it would reach her. I don’t know if it did. I don’t know if she physically received it (she kept going back and forth between a nursing home and a hospital), and I certainly don’t know if it arrived intellectually/emotionally.

    That haunts me. I feel like I threw away my chance at having a relationship with her.

    1. Martin, it is interesting to read your comments about your relationship with your grandmother. Even though you may wonder if she knew of your concern and feeling of fondness for her, I would bet that she understood and realized that you were her grandson and cared about her. I, too, had a long distance relationship with a grandfather and know I missed out on a worthwhile relationship.

  3. Story is something very special, and every couple have it’s own. When Judy and me got engaged ten years ago, we couldn’t afford a engagement ring, so our parent borrowed us money to by something cheep just to put on her hands. As years are going, and we are growing, earning enough for us, our kids, the love is still the same like the first day. True love, that we both cherish, all this years, respect to each other, everything is the same like the first time when we sad I LOVE YOU. Now, on our 10th anniversary , I will surprise with real diamond ring. I hope she will be stunned.

  4. I agree with Peter. There is a special meaning hidden inside that ring. Diamonds are there to seal the deal. If you can afford them of course.

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